Wednesday, June 22, 2016

A Belated Birthday Post

Two months ago our second oldest daughter celebrated her seventh birthday.

Abbey and Trent for their annual daddy-daughter date!
This post is truly a joy to write as our mother-daughter relationship has changed so much over the past year.

Monkey see- monkey do. Abbey is proving herself to be such a compassionate big sister.
As a teeny, tiny toddler, Abbey was by far my hardest child. She fought me and knew exactly how to push my buttons. In response, I did the worst thing possible, I withdrew from her. It wasn't until I heard another mom share how when you have a difficult child you need to PRESS INTO that child. What she meant was, go out of your way to find things to praise them for, to invite them to sit with you and read books,  to color with you, or bake with you or garden with you.
Sweet sisters
I knew I didn't want our relationship to continue on the path it was going, so I tried. I tried harder to invite her into my world. When she would push me, I would press into her. Did she still need disciplined? Absolutely! But even our discipline started to look a little different. Instead of me just getting angry and frustrated, I worked to be more self-controlled. Her discipline was then followed up with discussion and prayer. Eventually when she was about to "blow" she started asking me to pray for her.

Abbey loves to help in the kitchen.
Now, my seven-year-old Abbey is a delight to my heart. She has learned so much self-control, and I have learned new parenting techniques. It wasn't enough for me to say, "She has a different personality from me. I don't understand why she responds to situations like she does." I needed to work harder to be the best mom for Abbey that I possibly could. I still make mistakes, but I think we've made some great improvements!

A little about Abbey at seven. 
*Abbey is SO excited for her little sister to come home from China. She thinks we should name her sister Lily or some other flower.
*Abbey is an introvert.
*Abbey LOVES to joke. I'm continually surprised at her wit. (For example - she has had a loose tooth for awhile and we thought she would lose it while we were visiting friends in Virginia. She didn't. But she said, "if I pull it out in the truck on the way home you'll just have to throw me back some cash." :: She did pull it on the way home and I DID crumple up and throw her back "some cash".)

Three top teeth gone, and her Ca$h.
*Abbey loves reading. The book she is digging into now is Charlotte's Web.
*Abbey experienced a miracle just before her seventh birthday. She has had chronic constipation since she was an infant and was on a daily medication. Without it the consequences were quite painful. She asked if she would have to have this medicine for the rest of her life. When I told her I didn't know she was pretty upset. We prayed about it and talked about it for awhile. After that we decided to take her off the medicine. In the past two months she has only needed it one time. We are so thankful for her miracle!!
*Abbey loves gardening. She is always my buddy out in the garden. As a prize for her memorizing Paul Revere's Ride by H.W. Longfellow I surprised her with a really nice trowel. Not many 7-year-olds would be thrilled that they spent FIVE hard weeks memorizing a long poem to get a trowel - but Abbey was! She hugged me so tight and was thrilled to have it!
*Abbey will probably be a runner someday. She just loves running outside. I could definitely see cross country running in her future.
*Abbey doesn't like having her picture taken.
*Abbey loves sweets (just ask her Sunday School teacher, right Miss Janice??)

We love you, Abbey Frances! Happy seventh birthday my Toothless Wonder!
xoxo,
Mama