A Great Loss

Twenty-eight years young. My age. A whole life ahead, waiting to play out, to journey, to love, to give, to lose. Two young people, in love, living life, two young boys and a baby on the way. A life cut short. A tragedy. An accident. Now one young widow, left to raise a four year old, a two year old and a baby due in a few short weeks.

A fall from a roof left a young man dead. Both high school classmates of mine. Dan Mast died on May 21, 2013, and left behind my high school friend Becca. I have no words to help, no words to give, no words to ease the pain. The loved ones he left behind now must carry on without him.

James 4:14 says, "Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes."

Job 1:21 "and said: "Naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked I will depart. The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away; may the name of the LORD be praised.""

Hebrews 13:15 "Through Jesus, therefore, let us continually offer to God a sacrifice of praise--the fruit of lips that openly profess his name."

Recently I have been caught up in the excitement of buying a house, fixing it up, painting, and right now I should be packing. Instead I sit here numb, imagining myself in Becca's situation. She has posted on Facebook about giving thanks even for the hard things. I have shared before about the Holy Spirit speaking to me through Scripture. The above three verses came to my mind as soon as I sat down to type.

Most of us cannot imagine bringing a "sacrifice of praise". Sacrifice means it isn't easy. It isn't the praise that we easily give when things are going well. It is the praise we offer to God when things AREN'T going well. When we are struggling with our health, finances, relationships, death.

Dan did not have any life insurance. If any of you feel led to give, please consider donating to http://www.danielmastmemorial.com/  . If you click on the link you can donate directly through Paypal or you can use the address provided to send donations.

All prayers are appreciated, especially as Becca prepares to deliver their third child.

Busy days (and Nights)

We have been SO crazy the past week and a half. We have just over five days before we move. The new house is a MESS and our current house is just as bad. We've been back and forth more times than I can count. Trent's dad has been completely amazing through this all. He is a serious "Jack of all trades". He has been up on our roof to fix something, he has installed light fixtures, patched walls, reworked plumbing to install a laundry room on the first floor (the previous owner had 2 laundry hook-ups on the 2nd floor??), and countless other things. He is going to be working on installing the kitchen cabinets, the rest of the lights and some other stuff for us this week. He shrugs it off like, "Eh, it's no big deal." But really, it is a big deal. There is no way we could have bought this house if we didn't have him!

Trent is at the house now (10:44 pm) and is scraping wallpaper off the laundry room walls, prepping the half bath to be painted, and maybe even painting some more in the foyer. He took a sleeping bag with him and will be sleeping at the house tonight so that he can get an early start tomorrow morning (he took off work Monday). Trent will work on painting the foyer and hallway and probably helping his dad with the installation of the cabinets. Later Monday he'll come home and I will be meeting a friend from church to paint (I'm hoping to, with Christa's help, paint the schoolroom). Tuesday my mom is going to go to the new house with me and I'm hoping that we will be able to get the half bath, the laundry room, and the dining room all painted. If we finish all of those things I'd love to work on painting some of the trim. At some point next week Trent will be shampooing the carpets and I will continue to pack up everything at our Conestoga house, along with my regular day-to-day stuff (taking care of the kids, keeping up with laundry, cooking, washing dishes, etc.)

I'm trying not to feel stressed. I also have some Mama Hess signs that I need to finish up. I'm hoping to get one finished tomorrow morning and get those out of the house before the week ends so that I'm not packing those, too. Ay-yi-yi! It's crazy!!

What will they think of me?

On Wednesday we settled on our house! But all the time in the back of my mind I am wondering, "But what will people think of me?" When people would ask us about the house Trent and I were a little embarrassed to answer. The house does need some work, but it is a really nice house with 1.7 acres. I always feel like I need to tell people, "THERE IS NO WAY WE COULD AFFORD THIS HOUSE IF IT WAS WHAT IT SHOULD BE AND NOT A FORCLOSURE."

I think part of the reason for this inner-battle is because I know there are people who are really struggling to make it, day-to-day, and it seems a little unfair that we are getting this nice house. So I feel guilty and struggle over the fact that I do not deserve this house more than any other of my friends. If I have talked to you about the house and did not seem over-excited it is because I'm a little embarrassed and I'm worried about what you will think of me.

I debated whether or not to post pictures of the house on Facebook, but I went ahead and did it. Facebook is such a breeding ground for "one-upping" other people. I try hard not to fall into that category by just posting funny things that the girls say and cute pictures of the kids. But I knew I had friends and family that are not local who would like to see pictures, so I went ahead and posted them.

The interesting thing is this: we had put offers in on two other houses in the same price range as the one we purchased, and I did not really have this feeling about either of them. Why is that?  Well, one was an older farmhouse (which is what I anticipated we would be in) and the other was a 3 bedroom rancher. They were houses that were built a little bit more modestly (although the farmhouse did have the same square footage as our house, it just didn't look huge from the front.)

But the bottom line is this, we are humbled, grateful and excited to be in this house. We were surprised at how many people we know who live very close to us. I don't know what God has in store for us at this place, but I am looking forward to beginning our journey as "Southern Lancaster Countyans"!!

A New Adventure

Adventure Part 1- A HOUSE!

As most of you know, my dear husband and I have found a house, which will be our home, hopefully for the next 30+ years. The first day the house came on the listing I emailed it to Trent with this message, "Am I unnecessarily excited about this?" And he responded, "Yes."  The house was a HUD house (forclosure with government-backed financing). After the house was still listed for a couple weeks I kindly urged Trent to go look at it with our real-estate agent (who is also a friend). The house definitely needs some work, as the previous owners were not happy that their home was being forclosed on so they removed pretty much everything they could (cabinetry, shelving, light fixtures, mirrors, etc.) But over all the house is in good shape. We made an offer on the house (and I hadn't even seen the inside, yet), and the offer was accepted!! That was almost 2 months ago, and we are finally ready for settlement, which will happen in five short days.

The front of the house!

Those of you who know me best will probably be surprised at what the house looks like. I'm old-fashioned, and love pretty much anything that is old (old houses, old furniture, old people). I always imagined myself living in a nice old historic home with lots of old-world charm. But old houses require heaps of money and large amounts of time. At this point in our lives our focus is on our children and we don't have the time or money to spend on a true fixer-upper.

We are so grateful to have found a house where we can raise our family, and I am excited to paint and decorate. I'm not sure how my love of "country" decor will work with this house, but I'm eager to get started!

Adventure Part 2 - HOMESCHOOL
Caution Note: I do not intend for this blog to become a "homeschool blog" but I may have a few posts every now and then dedicated to the subject.
I always said I would never homeschool my kids. Do you know why? Homeschool kids are weird. It's amazing that being a parent for 5 1/2 years can changed things. I'm not exactly sure why, but whenever the subject of school is brought up (as Annie will start Kindergarten in the fall) I cringe.

For some reason I always feel the need to justify myself or explain why I am choosing homeschool. It's really rather silly, as I have never asked or even thought to ask any other parent why they choose public school or why they choose private school. I do not have any friends who homeschool their children, so maybe that is why. So many of "us" (as in moms with little children) base our parenting on how we were raised or experiences that we had. Some had awesome public school experience, so they choose public school. Some had wonderful teachers in private school, so they choose that for their own dear ones.

I had good and bad public school experiences and I had good and bad private school experiences. Some adamantly proclaim that it is what happens at home that is truly important. I was a child easily influenced by my peers. I see those same tendencies in one of my children. So for her, for now, for this year at least, I believe homeschool is the best option to help her succeed. She will still have her failures in homeschool as she would anywhere else, but I'm hopeful that with me there to guide her through her emotions that she will have a better chance at succeeding when she is daily faced with peer pressure.

Adventure Part 3 - MAMA HESS PAINTING
A few weeks ago I shared a "just for fun" post of some signs that I have been making. At the urging of my sister, Stacy and one of her photography clients who I did some work for, I started a "Mama Hess Painting" facebook page with some samples of my work. And the orders have come pouring in!! I am so humbled and amazed that other people actually like my signs. I really have fun making them (they are a great nap-time creation) and I'm honored that people want them hanging in their homes! I'm not sure where it will lead, but I am really grateful for the opportunity to create!

Adventure Part 4 - RAISING THREE LOVELY GIRLS
This is such a joy to me!! I am amazed that God entrusted three precious girls to me. The girls are constantly asking for a brother, although we recently had the privilege of babysitting a 5-month-old girl and they decided another sister wouldn't be too bad.  We are all still missing our foster-son. I had a dream the other night that the agency called and asked us to take him again. Just wishful dreaming I guess.....