Caroline turns Three

It's so hard to believe that Caroline is now three years old. She arrived four weeks early, a scheduled C-Section, in all her tiny glory. Though we knew she would be small, we had hoped she would be healthy. She experienced significant fluid in her lungs at birth and was immediately taken to the NICU.

At two days old she developed a hole in her lung. I was immediately grateful that she WAS in the NICU. She was exactly where she needed to be so the nurses and doctors would be awake, monitoring her in the middle of the night, (2 am) when she would experience this distress. She was sedated, had surgery to insert a chest tube, and placed on a ventilator. It was so awful to see her in that condition.

Christmas day, three days after her lung collapsed, I was finally able to hold her.

12/25/13 : 5 days old

Every Christmas I put on that same flannel shirt and take another picture with Caroline, holding her to my chest. It serves as a visible reminder to me of how precious her life is, and how holding her in my arms that day was one of the greatest Christmas gifts I will ever receive.

12/25/14 : 1 year + 5 days old

12/25/15: 2 years + 5 days

12/25/16 : 3 years + 5 days

And now Carrie is three. She is so spunky and fun. She is such a chatterbox and says the most hilarious things. On her birthday we ate chili for dinner. She ate everything out of her bowl that she liked. Then she said, "I want some more cold." I had no idea what she was talking about. She repeatedly told us she wanted more cold and got angrier by the moment that we didn't know what she was referring to. It finally dawned on me that chili = cold. I was amazed that she was able to recognize chilly as a synonym for cold and replace the word was had been using to describe the meal with a word she was more familiar with. She was delighted when we finally understood what she meant and ate her "cold" with gusto.

birthday cookie

She is completely devoted to her sisters (usually it's a different sister each day), but most often it is Abbey. Caroline absolutely loves babies. Her current favorite little person is her cousin Matteo. She delights in him (it's hard not to, he is really sweet and cute!)

Her new baby "Olivia"

Caroline is so excited to be a big sister. Every time we get a new picture or video of her sister she loves to look at it and talk about her sister and be hopeful for when she will get to see her in real life.

Caroline is also excited to move into the same room with her older sisters. I feel very strongly about the bond created by sharing a bedroom. We (as in I) have decided that Caroline will move in with her big sisters sometime in the New Year. I hope to create a new post for that transition.

always drawing

Caroline still sucks her thumb when she sleeps. She will only suck her thumb when she has her special night time blanket. She never sucks her thumb during the day.

She is definitely, very much a three-year-old. She is starting to assert her own will more and more. She is very sensitive. Usually if I tell her "no" very sternly she will start crying.

She loves playing the game Sequence for kids, but only according to her own rules. She likes beans, and chips and salsa and sour cream. She loves coffee with cream. She hates to have her hair brushed and her teeth brushed, unless she is doing those things by herself. She likes to snuggle up to watch movies. She went to Sight and Sound Theater to see Samson and loved when he knocked all the walls down. She loves Sunday School and her teachers. She intentionally wriggles during church so she can go to nursery with her beloved cousin, Matteo. She likes painting her fingernails, and has unfortunately gone to great lengths to achieve this; going so far as to get a stool, put it in the closet to reach the nail polish , and paint her own nails while the rest of us were busy elsewhere in the house. When she was found out she immediately started crying and saying she was sorry. She loves sparkles and boots and sparkly boots from Mema. She loves her piggy bank and delights in demanding coins from her Grandpa every Wednesday night. She likes tea parties with Grandma and books in her bed.

All that to say, Caroline is a joy to our hearts. We are so glad she was born. While she still is just a peanut, she is quite healthy, with just a tiny white scar to show for her rough start. Happy third birthday little bird. We love you!

For my Moms

As is typical, my Mother's Day post comes days after Mother's Day. Those of you who are on Facebook no doubt read countless posts about other people's mothers. Perhaps you posted something about your mom yourself. My Mother's Day post was about my sweet Caroline, in tears, over the fact that her doll baby wouldn't take a human pacifier.

 

She actually wiped her eyes with the bottom of her dress. It was hilarious yet so true to how many of us feel as moms at times, even if we don't express those feelings in the same way.

First of all, I must say, I have a great mom. What was really cool to me as I read through my news feed on Facebook on Sunday was how so many people feel that they have the best mom ever. True, not everyone did, in fact, some stories were heartbreaking, but for the most part, moms are doing a better job than they think they are.

My church's monthly newsletter asked several people to write one thing their mom taught them. I was one of the lucky people who got to write about their mother. I thought I would share with all of you dear people what I learned from my mother. (Also, I generally call her mother when I'm irritated with her - a fact that I didn't know until she pointed it out to me in my early 20s -from here on out I'll refer to her as "mom".)

My mom is good at many things, but not everything. She is human. She is beautiful, and funny, and strong. My mom started running 5ks at age 58. She is wonderful and inspiring. She is not perfect, but she tries hard.

Mom and me at BCF Group's Christmas dinner

 One thing my mom has taught me is how to have faith. There were many times growing up when I knew finances were tight. We did not have any money, in fact, I'm pretty sure we were in debt. My mom always believed that we would make it. I've mentioned before that I love to journal. I just looked back and read some journal entries from my time away at college. I was in Jackson, Mississippi, studying at Jackson State University, and my parents were separating. It was an emotional time, for sure. I would talk to my mom on the phone every couple of days. She had been telling me of how badly she needed money. I had written prayers out in this journal. I had only truly professed Christ about 9 months before this time. The prayers I had written seemed so incredibly bold. But I believed them. Several days from that original prayer, I wrote an answered prayer. (I know some disagree about playing the lottery, and I'm not exactly sure how this 50/50 game works, but please, bear with me here). My mom won $700 in this 50/50 at her job. It was a big deal. It was a building block in my own faith. 

Mom and baby me (1985 - we had cool hair)

 This lesson and several others have served me so well as I have gone through many different trials in my adult life. Financial hardships early in our marriage, emotional hardships with a difficult pregnancy, having the faith that God knows what He is doing through our foster care experience, and more. So thanks, mom, for showing me through your life, that God is faithful, He is good, and He knows our needs.

There are probably thousands of jokes about mothers-in-law. Here is one:

David is finally engaged and is excited to show off his new bride. "Ma," he says to his mother, "I'm going to bring home three girls and I want you to guess which one is my fiance." 

Twenty minutes later, David walks in the door with three girls behind him. "It's that one," said his mother without blinking an eye. 

"Holy cow," exclaimed David, "How did you know?" 

"I just don't like her," she replied.

So David Is finally engaged, and is excited to show off his new bride. “Ma”, he said to his Mother, “I’m going to bring home three girls and I want you to guess which one is my fiance.” Sure enough twenty minutes later, David walks in the door with three girls following behind him. “It’s that one”, said his mother, without blinking an eye. “Holy cow”, exclaimed David, “how in the world did you know it was her?” “I just don’t like her”, she replied.

Read more at:

So David Is finally engaged, and is excited to show off his new bride. “Ma”, he said to his Mother, “I’m going to bring home three girls and I want you to guess which one is my fiance.” Sure enough twenty minutes later, David walks in the door with three girls following behind him. “It’s that one”, said his mother, without blinking an eye. “Holy cow”, exclaimed David, “how in the world did you know it was her?” “I just don’t like her”, she replied.

Read more at:

I didn't have grandparents living in the same state growing up, so I had very limited experience with seeing my parents interact with their in-laws. I don't have a single memory of my dad interacting with my mom's parents. And I know that my mom still has a good relationship with my dad's mom, even though my parents are now divorced. 

I am so very grateful for my mother-in-law. Our relationship has certainly grown in the nearly ten years that Trent and I have been married. I really have to give her credit for that. Every Wednesday my mother-in-law feeds my family. She invites us to her home, and makes food for us. I'll be honest, when we were first married it sometimes felt like more of a burden than a blessing. I didn't necessarily want to spend an evening with my in-laws every week. I grew up in a family who talks a lot. Before, during and after we eat we talk. Trent's family reads the newspaper. It was an adjustment. And then we started having babies. And some days those Wednesdays were hard, because my babies like routines and schedules, and that often included an early bedtime. But we went, and they loved on our kids. And  my mother-in-law makes food and dessert and reads to my kids. They have tea parties, and she surprises them with little additions to her toy area (a new hat, clip on jewelry, etc.). 

Tea party

 I have come to cherish our talks after dinner, when the kids are sent to play and she cleans up some dishes and I wipe the table. Our whole family looks forward to Wednesday nights with the Hesses. We hold tightly to those days and skip out on extracurricular things (like AWANA, Bible School, and anything else that happens to meet on Wednesday nights). I know preparing food for our gang might not be her favorite thing to do (especially because it's pretty much guaranteed that at least one child won't eat whatever she prepares), but I do appreciate it. And let's be honest, not having to prepare food once a week is a HUGE blessing to me!

My mother-in-law, Maggie, Anne, Me, Abbey, and my sister-in-law Sarah on Easter.

So thanks, to both my moms. Great job raising Trent, Maw. Great job raising me, mom. I hope that I can continue to learn from both of you for years to come.

So David Is finally engaged, and is excited to show off his new bride. “Ma”, he said to his Mother, “I’m going to bring home three girls and I want you to guess which one is my fiance.” Sure enough twenty minutes later, David walks in the door with three girls following behind him. “It’s that one”, said his mother, without blinking an eye. “Holy cow”, exclaimed David, “how in the world did you know it was her?” “I just don’t like her”, she replied.

Read more at:

So David Is finally engaged, and is excited to show off his new bride. “Ma”, he said to his Mother, “I’m going to bring home three girls and I want you to guess which one is my fiance.” Sure enough twenty minutes later, David walks in the door with three girls following behind him. “It’s that one”, said his mother, without blinking an eye. “Holy cow”, exclaimed David, “how in the world did you know it was her?” “I just don’t like her”, she replied.

Read more 

Looking Back

I have a terrible memory. Seriously, ask my kids. They are constantly reminding me of things I said I would do, but forgot. And if I'm half asleep when talking to you, psshhh, forget it. I probably won't recall ever having a conversation with you.

My poor memory skills are probably why I love blogging so much. If it is written down then it must have actually happened (even if I can't remember it clearly). I also love to journal out those raw emotions. I am often embarrassed by what I write when emotional, but it is so healing in the moment to get them out in a safe place, and later to look back on them.

Monday mornings I give my two oldest girls a spelling pre-test. It is good for them to see growth in short-term way. It's hard for adults to see how they are growing in the moment, how much more challenging must it be for our 6 and 7 year old children? For the past two or three weeks Abbey (age 6) has gotten all of her spelling words right on the pre-test. Whenever this happens I "reward" them by not having them take the test on Friday. This Monday morning, however, Abbey missed one word. To say the girl was upset would be an understatement. Mind you, these are words that she has not studied, and she does not have access to the list ahead of time that she could peek at it. She was distraught over this one little word she missed (I told you she is a perfectionist).

To encourage her little heart I reminded her of how hard even the simplest words were for her in the beginning of the year. She grabbed her language arts binder (that is such a pain for me to put together, but man, today I was glad I did), and flipped to the very beginning. And she laughed. And laughed. And laughed. Oh, what joy that brought to my heart. She looked back to the beginning of the school year. The word was "are", she spelled it "R" on her pre-test, week 1 of the school year. And she laughed! It was very real to her, and showed her just how far she has come this year. I could have cried.

Yes, I'm teaching spelling, but I like to think it is so much more than that. I'm teaching these girls the value of looking back on life. We don't stay back there, we move forward. Yet there is value in looking back. To take a peek at what life was like less than a year ago is important.

Just the other night my dear husband and I were looking back. He had gone through times of self-doubt, of not knowing where he was going, what he wanted to do, where he wanted to go in life. And he prayed and prayed and prayed for direction, never feeling like he was going anywhere or being led. As we talked through the decisions he made he realized just how much the Lord was leading him, guiding him, and setting him on a path. It didn't feel like it at the time, yet when he took a moment to look back, he realized how all these little pieces that didn't seem like much (quitting one job to take a pizza delivery job) all fit together and created this beautiful picture.

Sometimes looking back can be painful. I think of our foster son and daughter on a regular basis. I know I have learned a lot from that experience. However, it is still painful in many ways to look back on that time. I'm sure that someday (maybe not on this side of Heaven) I will see how those months fit into my mosaic to create something whole and beautiful. Certainly I am changed because of that experience.

Isaiah 61:3 (New Living Translation) To all who mourn in Israel, he will give a crown of beauty for ashes, a joyous blessing instead of mourning, festive praise instead of despair. In their righteousness, they will be like great oaks that the LORD has planted for his own glory.

Portions of this verse pop into my head from time to time, but I'm not sure that I ever noticed those last three words. The beauty for ashes, the joy instead of mourning, the praise instead of despair, it's for HIS OWN GLORY. Not for us. Not for me. For Him. Wow. 

I'm just letting that sink in.

I will leave you with this: Gungor "Beautiful Things". Hands down one of my favorite songs. 

I encourage you to take a few minutes today, sit, and think. The weather here has been beautiful. Grab a cup of tea or coffee, watch the kids play in the yard, and look back and realize the beautiful things He has done for HIS OWN GLORY in your life.

Mother's Day is on the Way

It's hard to believe that Mother's Day is right around the corner, I feel like we just celebrated Christmas!

Last year was a very busy time for me making signs that were sold through my Etsy store. I wanted to give you all some ideas for moms, and give you a gentle reminder of an order deadline. :)

MOTHER'S DAY ORDER DEADLINE - if you need your sign shipped, please order by Sunday, April 26, 2015!!! If you are local and want to pick up, please order by Tuesday, April 28, 2015. I'm currently at about a 7-10 day lead time, but I have some commitments coming up where I will not be able to work as much.

Not everything is listed in my Etsy store yet. I'm working on a small amount of inventory for us (yes, this includes me) last minute shoppers.

First up - this Jen Hatmaker quote has been my most popular sign on Etsy. At the time of this writing I have one ready-to-ship/ pick up listed in my Etsy store.

This exact sign is available here.

 If you want to customize this sign in your choice of colors, or look at a few other samples follow this link.

This sign for a laundry room/nursery is also available now.

You can find this one also listed in my Etsy Store.

This sign can be customized here.

Those two signs are currently what is trending in my Etsy Store. These makes great gifts for a husband to give to a wife. Ladies, the Etsy links seem to work well for men. Be sure to tell your husband what colors you like.

If you are shopping for YOUR mom, now that's a different story! I have a variety of signs specifically for Grandparents. The two I'm going to share with you have many different options, but none of these are listed in my Etsy Store. You may contact me on my Facebook Page : Mama Hess Painting.

Current prices for these signs are $30 (without clothespins) or $35 with clothespins. These signs are approximately 8"x24". You can customize colors and number of pins. Clothespins can be painted or stained to match your colors. I currently have two signs available.

1. Shown with a black background, cream "grandkids" and gray "make life grand". It currently does not have any pins attached but that can be done if you desire.

This sign is available now!

 2. Grandkids - Fearfully and Wonderfully Made. Shown stained "golden oak" with black lettering. This sign has twine securely attached for you to hang your clothespins from (this allows for more space and is flexible if the number of grandkids continues to grow!)

This sign is available NOW.

This sign can be customized without any pins, with pins attached directly to the sign, or with the twine.

THIS IS SOLD! This is to give you an example of what the sign looks with the clothespins attached.

Thank you all so much for your continued support of my little business! It's truly a joy!

**All PA sales are subject to a 6% sales tax. Prices are subject to change as time progresses. Please contact me via private message on my Facebook Page with any questions.**

Slow Down

Thursday was quite the day for us. As many of you dear readers know, I'm a homeschooling Mama. I love it. I choose to be home bound most days of the week. However, Thursday I decided to be adventurous. I took all four girls to Sports Authority right around nap/rest time. I know, I'm a wild one. I like to live dangerous.

Caroline only wanted Anne at the store.

Soon after returning home from the aforementioned trip, our power went out. Kind of weird, since there didn't appear to be much wind. However, we live in southern Lancaster County, so it wasn't completely shocking. Last summer (or fall?) the same thing happened - there were random tree branches down on the power lines. I figured a similar thing happened.

Maggie looking for a poem for me to read to her.

Plans for Thursday dinner were leftovers. In the microwave. Which requires electricity. I called Trent at work. He says not to worry, the estimated time was 8 pm, and it's always on before that.

Trent gets home, still no electricity. I went for a run (remember that 2015 goal - run a 5k)... While running my phone battery dies (I think being out of the house in the afternoon plus having no electricity/wifi drained the battery really quickly). I get back from my run and Trent asks if I got his message... Um, No. My phone is dead. He had texted me to ask me to bring Burger King home for dinner. This resulted in a family trip to BK to eat INSIDE (seriously, you would have thought we were at a 5 star restaurant). The kids were awesome, and we all had so much fun!

For some reason I find this photo hilarious. Anne desperately wanted someone to come play outside with her.

We got home to a dark house, put the girls to bed, and then... What? What do you do when you have no phone, no wifi, no light. We read the Bible together with a headlamp for light and each caught up on a little reading. I had signs to paint but couldn't work on them. As I was praying two words came to my head. Slow. Down. I don't really consider myself a very busy person, mainly because I don't leave the house that often. However, as I sat in the dark thinking of all the things I "need" to do, I began to realize how hard it is for me to sit still. To just be still. To be in the presence of the Lord. I say that I want to do that, yet I don't make the time to do so.

Doodled this in the dark Thursday.

As I let those words roll around in my brain I thought of all the things I thought I should be doing {painting, dishes, cleaning, returning emails, replying to FB messages, checking my Etsy store, checking Instagram, thinking about the next day's school lesson, completing my homework for my Bible study, contemplating a discipline issue with a particular child, wondering if I was too hard on the kids today} and I made my brain just stop. Because how many times will I get a chance to really slow down like I was forced to do Thursday night.

Took some time to play a game Friday at school

Abbey really enjoyed her BK crown.

 I know that Sunday (or whatever day you take as your Sabbath) is supposed to be a day of rest. Yet for many of us Sundays are one of the hardest days of the week (hello - getting four girls and myself ready for church to leave by 8:40 am!?) and are far from restful (especially if you are involved in any form of ministry).

Enjoying our restful Sunday.

These two are the best of friends and playmates. (they are rushing inside to bandage up dolly who got a thorn scratch)

 This weekend I really focused myself on slowing down. On truly enjoying the every day, simple moments. Of letting go of what "needs" done, and allowing myself to cherish my sweethearts while they are still small(ish).

Watching toads emerge from hibernation

Toad watching

Here are some photos of us enjoying the moment

Anne flying her kite.

 A series of night time photos.

How do you slow down? What are some tricks you can share with me?

Today I will be Thankful

I have a new sign that I made at the beginning of 2015. Tonight (or this morning) I am working on the third copy of this sign.

To see this sign finished, you can find it in my Etsy store HERE.

The sign reads:
Today I will be thankful, for all the little socks and the grass-stained jeans, and the endless piles of laundry. For there will come a day when the laundry basket is empty, and these days will be profoundly missed.

Friends, if you look closely in the above photograph you will notice the top of a laundry basket. This was not a staged photograph. I recently bragged (oh how I hate to admit this) how my children are SO healthy. We are rarely sick. And you know that sweet little Proverb (Proverbs 16:18 to be exact) which says this "Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall.". Oh, you guessed it. This weekend we were sick. Sick, sick, SICK. First the husband, then the baby. Then the second oldest, then the third. Then me. Yes, me. Prideful, prideful me. Only one escaped, our oldest, dear Anne. Sweet, helpful Anne.

I digress. Here I am at 12:30 a.m. on my twelfth load of laundry for the day, painting a sign about laundry, and how these days will be profoundly missed. And I got to thinking - is this true? Is this really, actually true? Will I profoundly miss the days of cleaning vomit off my one-year-old? Or washing load after load of laundry that has been puked on? Or waking up in the night to change those sheets? 

And I prayed. I prayed for the sweet, dear Mama who will receive this sign. As she looks at it hanging in her laundry room as she washes load after load of clothes and sheets for her little ones, who won't always be little, I prayed that these words will be a reminder to her to keep pressing on. Because the Lord sees the good work she is doing. I don't. I don't even know her, but the Lord does.

And you know what? I think that maybe, just maybe, these days will be missed. I think of my own mom, who washed load after load of stinky soccer clothes for me. Often late at night because I would remember, "Oh mom, we have a home game tomorrow and my white jersey is dirty. Can you wash that for me? Thanks!" and I would hop into bed, knowing full well that my mom would have that jersey washed and dried and ready for me the next day. Because that's what moms do. 

I don't know about you, but that's the kind of mom I want to be. Maybe my kids won't remember anything about me doing their laundry, but they will know they always had clean clothes to wear (okay, maybe they won't always have matching socks - but that might be taking things just a little too far).

So friend, wherever you are tonight, I hope that you can be thankful for all those little mis-matched socks. Because these days will be profoundly missed. Don't believe me? Go ask your mom.