Hess Happenings: Shouldn't You Be In School?

I'm often asked what made me decide to home school. It's sort of a long answer so I figured a blog post might be a good way to go with this one!

First off, a very brief note: I know and understand that home school is not for every family nor for every child. Every one is certainly able to choose for themselves what schooling option is best for your family. I hope that nothing I say comes across as judgmental or preachy - that is certainly not my intent.

Now that that's out of the way.....

"Shouldn't you be in school?" This question was posed to my oldest daughter (age 7) this week. She was outside playing in our little patch of woods behind our house. There was an older gentleman cutting wood just beyond our property line and he asked this question. Anne's quick response was, "I'm home schooled!"

Part of me cringed when she told me this, because I am acutely aware that we are different. I love people, and I want them to love me. I've always worked SO hard to win the approval of everybody; my parents, my peers, etc. That means I want to fit in.

Is this weird?

I want to be like everyone else and do what everyone else is doing. I want to be the best at whatever it is I'm doing, and if I realize early on that I may not be the best (i.e. the three years I played saxophone and I did a victory dance when my little brother kicked the case and a key broke) I want to quit. Galatians 1:10 "Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ." {I professed Christ as my Savior just before my 19th birthday. I am learning to not allow my 'personality' to be an excuse for a lack what I know to be right.}

I never, ever in a million years would have thought I would be a home school mom. Nope. No way. Do you know why? Home school people and their kids are weird. Weird and different are synonyms. I don't like different, I don't like weird. Nope. Not doing it.

Anne reading "James and the Giant Peach" - age 5

You may want to be careful what you say.

I have a teaching degree from Millersville University, formerly known as "the teacher's college". After our oldest daughter was born and growing at an extremely rapid rate (does time speed up once you have children?), my mother-in-law wondered if I would consider home schooling. My immediate response was, "No." I didn't even want to think about it. No way. Not for me. Home school kids are weird.

Our celebration of 100 days of school - 2015

Then a funny thing happened. The Lord began to work on my heart.

Girls working on their "Heart Journals" - 2015

As I watched my girls grow (with a special focus on my oldest since she would be the one to go to school first) I noticed some interesting things about her behavior. First of all, she was very much like me. She is so very easily influenced by her peers. For example, when she was about three and a half years old we came home from the mom's group we attended weekly. Anne asked for a cracker at lunch. After providing her with the cracker, she began to chew it like a beaver, letting crumbs fall from her mouth all over her shirt, the floor, and the table. She laughed uproariously and sprayed cracker all over everything. (Can you picture this???) When asked what in the world she was doing she said a boy in her little class did that at snack time and everybody laughed and she really wanted to try it.

Anne reading a Highlights magazine to her sisters - summer 2013 (age 5 1/2)

This became nearly a weekly occurrence in our home. She would see another child do something (always something she knew she probably shouldn't do) and then she would come home and do it. Every. Week. And I thought, "My word! If this is what she does after being with other kids for 90 minutes, what will she act like when she is with them for a whole day?!"

Then something else happened. Anne started reading at age 4. (I didn't even know this was possible.) In my four years of college education and my miniscule time teaching before Anne was born, I had never taught any one how to read. It was a really awesome experience. I can't take credit for what happened next. She picked up her first little book and read it without help. Then our two foster children came into our lives and I no longer had the time to sit and work with her on a daily basis like I had been. About two month after she read that first book I was hurriedly trying to get dinner ready and juggle five children under age five (I don't recommend this). Anne offered to read to the kids for me. I thanked her and went about what I was doing. A few minutes later I peeked on the kids and she had them all lined up on the couch with her as she read aloud from Fantastic Mr. Fox by Roald Dahl. We had read it aloud together before so I assumed she was just retelling the story in her own words. Until I listened more closely. She was reading, with expression, a book on a second grade reading level.

Anne reading "Peter Pan"- age 5

It was at that point that I started to consider home school as a very real option for our family. None of my friends home school their children, so it was a really tough decision for us to make. The more I prayed about it the more clear it became that this is what I should do. If I had to give two main reasons why we chose to home school it would be these.

1. I want to have more influence in my children's lives than their peers. I want to build a firm foundation based on the truth of God's word before asking them to stand up to peer pressure on a daily basis. I want to be the one who talks to them about hard and controversial subjects. And trust me, we DO talk about them. I am not sheltering these kids so that they have no clue about the world. I would much rather them get facts from me than from their little seven-year-old friends.

A little hike to The Pinnacle in Holtwood, PA to see the frozen Susquehanna River: Winter 2015

2. The ability to meet their unique abilities. Teachers in public and private schools are amazing. We have a really awesome county where there are many many wonderful teachers. When Anne started Kindergarten she was reading at a sixth grade level. It did not make sense to me to put her in a class of children who are just learning to read. (Remember how Anne and I are alike? When something is easy our personality tends to get bored and then we get in trouble.) Currently Anne has about six weeks of first grade left. Her reading level is now at an 11th grade level. Although she reads at that level, she definitely doesn't comprehend fully all that she reads, and her pronunciations are sometimes a bit off on some of the larger words that aren't in our every day vocabulary. Our second daughter is a very different personality from Anne, but she is also very bright. She is five (normally Kindergarten age) and will complete first grade with Anne this year. Her reading level is approximately fourth-fifth grade. Our third daughter struggles with some of the things that came very easily to her older sisters. There are still four letters of the alphabet that, try as she might, she just cannot remember. But Maggie is by far the best storyteller and most creative of the three. I have every intention of encouraging her in those regards.